A topic that has been on my mind for a few weeks now is my family’s sensitivity to smells. Not all smells, mind you—just some. I want to start with my observations from my youth.

Strangely enough, I did not have much difficulty with smells when I was young. I believe this was mainly due to my mother’s sensitivity to smells. She was very aware of them, and as a result, we did not have much exposure. Growing up, I was acutely aware that certain smells—perfumes and colognes, mostly—were bad. One incident at a supermarket comes to mind. We were in line to pay, and someone nearby was wearing a cologne that my mother was highly reactive to. Just the smell caused her to collapse and pass out. It was terrifying for me as a child. We had to call a paramedic for her that day. I felt helpless and scared. I was unsure of what was happening or how to help her. For as long as I can remember, my mom did not wear perfumes. If she did, they were very light ones.

My older brothers and my father are not smell-sensitive, as far as I am aware. So, they never completely understood. My younger brother and I, however, are. I know this has impacted him a lot more than it has impacted me. I worry about him for that reason. He was once laid off from a job because of this sensitivity. A coworker’s perfume gave him massive headaches, and after multiple complaints to his bosses and the union, nothing was done. He was ultimately let go after persistently filing written complaints. When this happened, my father and older brother said he was just being difficult. They dismissed his struggles as an overreaction. They did not understand how bad smell sensitivity could be or how debilitating it was for him. Their lack of understanding increased his frustration. He was left without support from his own family. He dealt with the real and painful effects of his condition alone.

Like my brother, I also do not enjoy trips to the doctor to get “proof” of my condition. Neither of us is comfortable spending time in hospitals. I do not blame him for not wanting to prove his situation medically.

I am smell-sensitive, but I am grateful that I am not as sensitive as my mother. It is easier to explain my reactions to coworkers by comparing them to allergies or hay fever. However, the truth is, they are not the same. Some smells—flowers, perfumes, and manufactured scents—affect me significantly. When exposed to flowers or incense (my nemesis), I experience massive headaches. I also feel dizziness and the sensation that something solid is stuck in my eyes. If I am around them long enough, my eyes turn red. They become extremely irritated. My nose clogs up, and I have difficulty breathing. Because these symptoms resemble hay fever, it is easy to let people assume that is what I have.

There are certain times and places where this sensitivity affects me most regularly. On Teacher’s Day, my students often gift me flowers. I appreciate the gesture. However, I have to regift them because they trigger my symptoms. Social events organized by the school can also be overwhelming, as many of the attendees wear strong perfumes. Shopping in malls has become increasingly difficult. Flowers are now sold in the hallways. Many stores use incense to create a relaxing atmosphere. These situations make it challenging to navigate daily life while avoiding the worst of my reactions.

Perfumes and manufactured scents cause me severe headaches, lightheadedness, and dizziness. There are a couple of coworkers I avoid sharing an elevator with for this reason. Many shops in malls use incense to attract customers. This makes it difficult for me to follow my wife or older daughter into these stores.

That said, not every perfume or manufactured scent affects me, but most of the stronger ones do. Interestingly, lemon-scented cleaners, for example, do not bother me at all.

On the flip side, I deeply enjoy certain smells that others may not even notice. I love the scent of wood, especially cedar. At work, new wooden art shelves were recently installed in the hallway outside the art room. I sometimes find myself wandering down the hall just to inhale their scent. I also love the smell of grass, fresh-baked bread, clean rain (not acid rain), and snow. A fresh river has a great smell to it—fish do not.

Recently, my youngest daughter has started to show signs of smell sensitivity as well. So far, her reactions seem to be triggered by certain soaps and foot odor. She can smell my feet from across the house when I get home. This means I must wash them immediately or stay on the opposite side of the house. To help both of us, we use lemon-scented air fresheners in the bathroom.

Understanding the difference between smell sensitivity and allergies has been crucial for me. Smell sensitivity, or chemical sensitivity, is a neurological or sensory reaction to strong odors. It does not involve the immune system but instead causes symptoms such as headaches, dizziness, nausea, and brain fog. On the other hand, allergies are immune system responses to allergens like pollen, dust, or pet dander. These cause the body to release histamines, leading to red eyes, sneezing, congestion, and breathing difficulties.

In my case, when I experience headaches, dizziness, or nausea, it is likely due to smell sensitivity. My body perceives the odor as overwhelming. I experience red eyes and breathing difficulties. It’s likely an allergic reaction to airborne allergens in the smell. These allergens could be pollen or perfume in an enclosed space.

This distinction has helped me navigate my reactions more effectively and communicate them better to those around me.

Smell sensitivity is not uncommon in individuals with neurological conditions. These include Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD), Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD), and migraines. Many people with these conditions, like myself, experience heightened or altered sensory responses, including extreme sensitivity to certain smells. For some, strong odors can be overwhelming and cause distress, headaches, or even nausea, much like my own experiences. I have gained further insight into how neurological conditions relate to smell sensitivity. This has shown me how this issue affects different people in varying ways. I hope that by sharing my experiences, others who struggle with smell sensitivity can feel understood. I aim to help them find ways to manage their symptoms in a world filled with overwhelming scents.

I enjoy writing. It’s one of my pleasures in life. I write fiction, I write here about my observations of life. I write 2 other blogs. 1 for my class, and one about games. I write scenarios for Dungeons and Dragons. I write for my students, I write for myself. I love to write.

I enjoy Board games. I love playing them, I love learning about them. I love analyzing the designs. I love the history of them. I love the cultural impact some have had. I love mixing and matching them. They have been an important part of my life for my whole life.

The last two years I have rediscovered Youtube. I live in China, and it is blocked here. But there are some sneaky ways to see the videos. I generally watch it at night before I go to bed.

Almost every day, when I finish work I will engage in these things. When my youngest goes to bed, I will get a cup of tea and relax. I will watch Youtube videos, read about fantasy, or read about games. I might write a bit if I am inclined. But I do these things every day.

Earlier this week and last week, I would get home very emotionally drained. So drained that after I put my children to bed, I couldn’t do any of my stuff. I tried to read, I couldn’t. I would end up reading the same section 5,6,7 times and still not register it. I tried to write, but stared at a blank page for hours. I tried to watch TV to get Ideas. I would get 10 seconds into a video and then pause it for an hour.

I was just so drained, I couldn’t do what I needed to do to recharge. I wasn’t physically tired, so I couldn’t go to bed. But I literally couldn’t register anything each night. I don’t feel it was a shut down, because I could still get my tea. But that was basically all I could do.

And each day I would get up, head to work, and sort out the children for the day. Then come home with a lower energy than I had the day before.

Today is the first day I am able to put thoughts to page in 5 days.

I really try to keep a schedule for my posts, so If I miss a few over the next couple of weeks, this may be why.

Sorry.