On Monday I came home, curled up on my sofa in a blanket and turned a religious documentary on. Then I closed my eyes and just lay there. I use the show as a type of white noise to lull me to sleep. Regular white noise gives me headaches. However, if I can have a single human voice to listen to, I can begin to relax.

When I have Brain Fog, its like standing in an actual fog. I know the world is out there, but I cannot connect with it. I feel like my mind is pushing through taffy, and the more I push the more difficult it becomes. So I need to find ways to just shut down for a while. I can’t talk much, but I can listen. Its best if It is a single human voice to listen to. I often choose documentaries. Their voices are calm and soothing.

I have been asked by a couple of people about this lately, which sparked the topic. My daughter, who is very good about asking if I have the energy to play with her each day. If I need to say no, she plays in her bedroom. If I say yes, she brings her toys out to me and we play. She was asking about my blanket and my show on Monday.

I tried my best to explain. But I am sure I was not clear. I was groggy, and trying to make it simple for her to understand. I told her something about when I have had a lot of people needing me. They are either trying to get my attention or just being too overwhelming around me all day. I need the rest.

I have my rocking chair, But don’t get to use it much this semester. I have been finding myself trying to make time to sit in it. This has led to a lower productivity. I have more work right now, and less time. I have more classes. I have more events to get ready for. I also have more homework to check. There is more classroom designing to do. It seems there is more of everything.

I get so lost that I sometimes forget to turn on my music with my headphones. I will just sit there with the noise canceling headphones on, and stare at my workload for 5~20 minutes.

My other place I have discussed it is on Reddit. I joined the autistic community there. I have been giving advice to autists who are 1/2 my age or less. I also offer emotional support to this group. And one was asking everyone how they deal with brain fog. So I explained. I think it would be better with a weighted blanket, but I don’t have one right now.

Tuesday and Wednesday have been only slightly better than Monday.