Today was a hard day. It started before  I even woke up.

My nightmare last night was sitting amongst a pile of things I was trying to organize and tidy up. But the more I organized, the bigger the mess got. And no matter what I tried, it kept getting bigger and more disorganized.

When I  got to school this morning, things seemed much better. And then my student had a panic attack.  I tried to help,  but I reacted instead of thinking, and it made things worse.

Later, I took him to the nurse and went to eat.  Normally, when I feel bad, I need comfort food.  But today is the day they changed my pasta bolonaise to pasta cabonara.

Then I forgot I had taken my student to the nurse, and I thought I lost him a second time.

It was then it started. My heart began beating irregularly. My mind was everywhere, and I had to be on duty to watch the kids at recess.

I thought I could handle it. I put on my music I trimmed, I paced, but I couldn’t.

I collapsed into a crying twitching mess.

My good friends rescued me and let me go to my rocking chair.

I haven’t had an Autistic meltdown this bad in 10 years. But that is a story for another day..