A student and I had this conversation the other day and it has been rolling around in my head since. The conversation started with a comment of his that someone he knew had plans to move to a new country every year for the next few years. This year had been his first of the series, Vancouver being in Canada, and this fellow felt that since Vancouver was so easy to acclimate to for him (Coming from China) it would be easy for the rest of the world.

From my experience and my observations of traveling around like I do Traveling to live anywhere, Whether is be a new city or new country, follows 3 normal stages. each of the stages lasts about a year, for most people, but like anything people related it changes for person to person. Keep in mind that these stages generally only apply if you had a choice in the matter of moving, if you didn’t that stage 1 is skipped

Stage 1 is the Tourist, WOW factor stage. While in this stage everything about your new place is cool. You love going around and seeing the new things, or if your an indoorsy person, you just feel like this place is nice and so cool compared to your hometown / where you just left. The new town / country offers so much more than you had hoped. There is a lot to do and experience. You focus on the positives, and the benefits of living in this new location. Just like a tourist you find the place fascinating.

Stage 2 is the “Man this sucks” stage. The tourist, wow factor has worn off, you miss where you came from. You start to fantasize how much better the last place was. You get moody, and worried about things, because you can’t find what you like or need in the new area. Thing just haven’t stacked up to what you had dreamed, you feel homesick or isolated. At this stage you focus a lot on the negatives, the problems you are facing, and the positives tend to fade from you mind.

Stage 3 is the “Get over it” stage. you no longer believe the previous place was better, maybe you remembered why you left it in the first place, maybe something happened to help you feel more welcomed in the new place. Maybe you met good friends, or found the things you were missing. for whatever reason the new location starts to feel like home. This final stage is acceptance, this is the place you when you no longer want to move away from this place, or will find it difficult to. This is when you accept the place for what it truly is, problems and all.

Now this globe trotting friend of my student has a good idea of seeing the world, but 2 factors come into play I fear. First:  Vancouver is the most Asian city outside Asia and so acclimating here is not difficult for him.  Second: He’ll never pass the wow factor and truly understand the places he’s moving to.

Having just moved back from China myself, less than a year ago I feel I am on stage 3. My wife however is starting stage 2, and the kids are still in stage 1.