Family is probably the most important thing to me. It’s not important if they are blood relatives, In-laws, or people that I have adopted into my family (you know who you are). They are the most important people in my life. I trust them more than any other people I know, by choice. I don’t like family to fight or be mad at each other, and to me Family is there for each other, whether it be financially, or emotionally.

My family has been getting much bigger lately, and seems to grow every year. I am not going to count them out because that is ridiculous. I do not spend as much time as I should keeping in contact with each of them, not for lack of trying, but because I am lackadaisical in this way. I have no other excuse. I am getting better, but not immensely. This blog is my way of reaching out to each of the people I care about regularly and letting the world know what goes on in this shell I call a cranium.

When 1 of my family asks me for help, I don’t even think about it, I just give what I can. This has always been my way, and I believe it always will be. Some people call this one of my faults, but I believe it is one of my virtues. I will find a way to recuperate after helping. If someone tells me something about my family member I will not believe it until either, I have seen it for myself, or someone closer to the person (that is in the family) tells me.

If someone hurts my family member, I feel like having that person killed, but usually just spend time comforting and trying to help them get back on their feet. This has never been a chore, it has never been something that I dread, or that I get upset with. I do get frustrated when there is someone I am helping, that I feel is taking advantage of my charitable nature, And I never want my family to feel that I am doing that to them. There have been cases when I have had to show favouritism to one family member over the other, but I have decided upon a hierarchy that I believe is fair and would like to share as I feel it is the one most people should follow.

First and foremost trust your wife or husband over any and all others. You chose this person to spend the rest of your life with, you must have had a reason. If you find that you cannot trust them, than you may have made an unwise choice, but still sit with them and talk about situations and give them the benefit of the doubt. I trust my wife explicitly, if she needs something or asks for something for her friend or family member, I trust her that it is for a good cause. If it turns out bad, then at least it was a mistake we made together.

Next trust your children. You should trust your children to tell the truth. Hopefully, you have been raising them to do so, and want them to know that you trust them. EVEN IF YOU CATCH THEM IN A LIE. I never want my children to think that I don’t trust them. I will always trust them. If there is a situation that they could not know about and they make something up to fill in the void. (Come on we all have done this). I ask if they are sure and then offer for both of us to look it up together. I will trust my children over anyone other than my wife.

This layer doesn’t apply to me yet, but I feel that daughter and son-in-laws would be next. By proxy. You raised your children to make good choices (hopefully) they have chosen this person to spend the rest of their life with, make an effort to get along with them. These are the people who will be raising your grandchildren to be good people. Talk to them about situations you feel upset or worried about, especially if it revolves around a decision they made, or that you made that they disagree with.

Trust your brothers, sisters, mother, father, step-father, step-mother and the family you grew up with next (Including best friends from childhood). These are the people who made you who you are today. Trust them with your life. Go to them for help, offer to help them. If they suggest something, take it into serious consideration.

In-laws and step-sisters, cousins or family that you have not known for the majority of your life, maybe just ½ of your life. It’s not that these people are any more or less trustworthy, it’s that in the hierarchy of things (At least in my life), they have had less impact on your life and you should consider those above them in the hierarchy first. Go to these people for help when it is a problem you know they specifically have more knowledge or expertise in the field than the rest of the family.

Then there is the rest of the world. Trust them however you see fit. Some of us are great judges of character, some of us are not when it comes to trusting people. I generally treat people the way I want to be treated, and if I feel like they are not reciprocating I don’t associate with them. But as a general rule, trust and love your family, blood or not. It is better to believe in the best in someone, even if they fail to meet your standards, then to make them feel left out of the family. I cannot stand people who disown immediate-family members, however if you need to disown a cousin or two, go ahead, that’s fine in my book. But only if they are acting like they are not part of the family, not if they are just doing things you don’t like.

I love my family and feel very lucky and proud of the family I have.