I have been seeing a lot of things lately about parents worrying about their children not playing outdoors. The parents are always complaining “Woe is me my child won’t leave the video game screen.” Or something along those lines. “Children need to go outside into nature and play” is another cry commonly heard. I just shake my head. Both sets of parents are correct and incorrect.

As adults we look back at sliding on icy hills with crazy carpets, running in the forest from angry bees, camping in the forest after hiking for hours. We remember the positives of these experiences. One of the things we forget, is the why. We didn’t walk out into the cold wrapped in 15 layers of clothes away from our warm TV on the first time by ourselves. We didn’t do it the first 20 times by ourselves. Our parents wrapped us up, took us out and slid down the hill with us. They took us into the forest to show us that it was safe, and fun to play there, they took us camping and frog hunting, and stone skipping. From my experience, a lot of kids are not getting that parent time anymore. This is a sad fact of the new world.

Parents nowadays take the easy way out of things, instead of finding ways to spend time with their kids, they let the TV and Computer raise them. A startling number of children come home to an empty house after school. Who is going to guide them? You even see it on TV advertisements now, Parents installing cameras in the house to watch their kids from work with. Watching is not guiding. Watching is not parenting. Parenting is not a spectator sport.

Parenting is a proactive sport. You want your kids to play outside, take their device away, and take them outside. Take them camping, or hiking, and if you take their device away, do not bring yours. If they have to be outside away from technology, and you are playing Tetris or the like on your phone while with them, it lets them know with no uncertain terms you would rather spend time with your phone than them, and of course they will feel the same way about you.

Take the children outside, on beautiful days, but don’t forget when we were young what did we do on not-so nice days? Final Fantasy, Street Fighter, Duck Hunt, Super Mario. Sit down with your kids and play with them. This is an excellent way for you to spend time, let them know you are not too busy for them, and it gives you time to feel out the games they like to play. If you sit down and play a gory fighting game with your 7 year old, you might realize it is not a good choice, and suggest a more age appropriate game to play together.

We do not have a game system in my house. But I will sit with my children while they are playing their games, and watch them, they love explaining the games to me, and if they need help we take turns playing. I sit through hours of “Edge” a day. My wife does not have the patience for that game as it is literally a glowing cube rolling in a maze of other blocky shapes. But JD and I enjoy it. Ok I hate playing the game, but I enjoy the intricacies of it, and the devious mind of the designer.

If you want your kids to unplug for periods of time, then you must also unplug yourself, and this is a very hard thing for adults to do as well. Especially with the diverseness of devices now. I have found myself, turning off my tablet, only to sit and read a book on my phone. Which is not unplugging myself. Neither is turning off your Computer to go and watch TV. Lead by example, then your kids will be more likely to listen to you.

The crazy thing is, a lot of the games kids enjoy on their computer are available as Table-top variations on the game. I was shocked to find a 3D Plants Vs Zombies game in China, or a table top Bejeweled game. And if it’s not, then with a little creativity, you can make one. I have contemplated buying a batch of building blocks to make an “Edge” level for my son to try on the table, many times, and I will do it after the move.

Parenting should not be thought of as a chore, you should love spending time with your kids, and showing them what you feel is fun, Who knows they might teach you a few things about fun that you forgot in the humdrum life of an adult.